You’re Ready for a Change: 3 Ways to Get Clear on What you Want in your Career
Creating a vision board helps you get crystal-clear on what matters most - to you.
You’re known as superwoman, superman, superhuman - at home, at work, and in your community. You’re so proud of yourself - you are doing it all!
For many who value achievement and responsibility, living life to its fullest everyday means giving 110%, never dropping a ball, always saying yes, and squeezing in 30 hours of stuff into a 24 hour day. After all, since there’s no guarantee that tomorrow will come, doesn’t it make sense to do as much as possible today?
Unfortunately, running at 110% is not sustainable forever.
You may be forced to stop running on your hamster wheel one day, or you’ll decide to jump off of it yourself. It is in that moment, that you may find yourself standing next to that wheel, wondering if you should jump right back on and feel its familiar surface beneath your feet, and that exhilarating feeling of running, running, running …. or, to explore a different, unknown, or lesser known path.
You may find yourself overwhelmed by the sheer number of potential paths available to you. How do you identify potential paths, and find the one that’s right for you, right now?
In this article, we’ll explore three (3) things you can do to begin to get clear about what you might be meant to do next.
What is it that you want, really?
There are a zillion things you could do. A ton of things that you think you should do. And just a few things that you really want to do.
Getting clear on your values is where the magic begins. Your values are the things that you believe are important in the way you live and work. Your values should determine your priorities and guide you in how you live and work.
Although values are usually fairly stable throughout one’s life, values may change. For example, money and status may be a top priority at one point in your life, whereas at another point in your life, time and service to others may be most important.
When you’re living a life congruent with your values, you’re likely to feel calm, happy, and thrive. On the other hand, when you’re living a life that is not congruent with your values, you may feel “off” - and in some cases, even completely miserable.
You likely have a pretty good sense of what your values are, but have you intentionally spent time thinking about them?
Understanding your values, articulating them, exploring how you honor them (or fail to honor them) and the implications of doing so will help you figure out what’s right (and what’s not right) for you.
Exercise #1: Journaling
One way to begin to define your personal values is to look back on your life – to identify when you felt really good, and really confident that you were doing what you were meant to be doing.
What you’ll need: Grab a journal & a pen, or open up a Word or Google doc.
What you’ll do: Get comfy & follow the prompts below. Write / type away whatever comes to mind; it doesn’t need to be structured, formatted, or coherent - perfection is getting words down on paper / your screen. If you don’t like paragraphs, use bullet points. Just let it flow!
#1 Reflection: Joy
Think of 2-3 times you felt most joyful in your career & personal life.
Why were these times so joyful?
What were you doing?
What were you thinking?
Who were you with?
Where were you?
How were you feeling?
#2 Reflection: Pride
Think of 2-3 times you felt most proud in your career & personal life.
Why did you feel so proud during these times?
What were you doing?
What were you thinking?
Who were you with?
Where were you?
How were you feeling?
#3 Reflection: Sureness of Path
Think of 2-3 times you felt most sure of yourself in your career & personal life.
Why did you feel so sure of yourself during these times?
What were you doing?
What were you thinking?
Who were you with?
Where were you?
How were you feeling?
Having completed the two above exercises, consider:
What themes or patterns do you notice?
What thoughts come up for you, about the themes and patterns that you notice?
What feelings are coming up for you, about the themes and patterns that you notice?
What do you notice about what you value?
What might you do to live in greater harmony with your values?
Exercise #2: Post-It Notes
If you’re not big into journaling and/ or thinking about the past, here’s an alternative for you!
What you’ll need: Two stacks of post it notes (each stack in a different color)
What you’ll do: Over the next 1-2 weeks, carry around your two stacks of post-it notes. When you encounter a situation in your personal or professional life that evokes either strongly positive or strongly negative feelings, grab a post-it note and jot down details about the situation. Don’t overthink it - just jot it down.
Stack 1: Joy, Pride, & Confidence
When you find yourself feeling joyful, proud, or confident, grab a post-it note and jot down information like:
What are you doing?
Who are you with, or are you alone?
Where are you?
What are you feeling?
What thoughts are coming to mind?
Stack 2: Frustration, Upset, & Self-Doubt
When you find yourself feeling frustrated, upset, or doubting yourself, grab a post-it note and jot down information like:
What are you doing?
Who are you with, or are you alone?
Where are you?
What are you feeling?
What thoughts are coming to mind?
After a week or two of collecting post-it notes, organize them by color, and take them in. Notice:
What themes or patterns do you notice?
What thoughts come up for you?
What feelings come up for you?
What do you notice about what you value?
Exercise #3: North Star Statement
Now that you have a sense for what your values are, you should have a pretty good sense for how you define success for yourself. And, guess what? This is the guidepost you’ve been looking for.
It’s quite possible that you’ll find yourself struggling a little, or a lot, to reconcile your own values with the values of others in your life, like those of your extended family or your colleagues. You may find yourself being tested very regularly, too! This is why creating a north star statement can be so helpful.
Imagine yourself as a wise elder, having lived a rich, full life. Looking back at that incredible life of yours, how will you know you have succeeded?
Take some time to create your personal north star statement. It can be your own beautiful work or a poem, quote, book, or other existing work
Once you create it, print it out, write it out, and keep it somewhere where you will see it regularly, so it can serve as a reminder to you - like a customized mousepad, or an image for your laptop background.
For those of you who know or follow me, you know that for as long as I can remember, this quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson has served as my north star: “To laugh often and love much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and to endure the betrayal of false friends. To appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; to know that even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.”
I find myself coming back to this, time and time again. Whenever I find myself needing to choose whether to say “yes” or “no” to something - whether it’s a coveted professional opportunity, an invitation for a social gathering, or an opportunity outside of work - it serves to guide me in my decision.
Be honest with yourself about what a rich, fulfilling life means to you.
Rest Assured, You’ll Choose the Path you’re Meant to Take
Take comfort in knowing that whatever you choose to do next, you’re going to choose the path you’re meant to take. It may be a walk on a beautiful beach on a sunny day, or it may be a treacherous trek through a jungle. Whatever path you choose, you’ll have a unique point in time opportunity to discover and learn, to grow and to experience the journey.
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